So What Now?

May 30, 2017.  Today, I was told I may have cancer.  So…what do I do now?

I wasn’t expecting this.  This happens to women who have family histories of cancer.  This happens to other women.  Heart problems run in my family.  Diabetes runs in my family.  But not cancer.

What do I do now?  I hurry up and wait on an appointment with a specialist.  I patiently wait for the phone call that tells me when and where my biopsy will be.  Calmly, I go about my daily routine as if I never heard those words.  I go to work, I function, I act normal.  No one will know unless I tell them.  No one will know everything that’s going through my mind, how I’m making plans.  Who’s going to care for my pets?  How much recovery time should I expect?  What kind of treatments will they do?  Will I ever be able to sleep again?  Will I ever laugh again?

But nothing again will ever be normal, because I’ve heard those words telling me I may have cancer.

Part of my brain is numb.  This information is still processing and I can’t quite comprehend it all.  I don’t think I’ve fully accepted it.  I haven’t cried yet.

So what do I do now?  Today, I pray.  Today, I ask all my friends to pray for me, too.  I talk to God and somehow find peace with all this.  I ask Him for healing and strength and comfort and I don’t doubt for one second that He will get me through this, and HE WILL HEAL MY BODY.

Today, I was told I may have cancer.  Today, the earth shook a little, the sky darkened a little, and my life changed.  Today, I learned that four words, you may have cancer, would forever be implanted in my memory.

Today, I learn to praise God through the storms.
Take care of you….

Trish

Published by

Jotthoughts

These are the ramblings of a woman determined to prove there is life after 50 for women who are unmarried, divorced, or widowed, and choose to live alone. This is my journey through life. It is filled with memories, dreams, hopes, disappointments, failures, and faith. Walk with me as I explore each day with questions and observations, remembrances and thoughts, all in a jot.

4 thoughts on “So What Now?”

  1. Trish, if you need anything at all, call me– I’ll be there! 3045883264! Prayers and hugs!

  2. Praying for you physically and emotionally. Let’s hear “I may” be changed to “I don’t.”. About 20 years ago I thought maybe I do. I went to the ROC and made an appt to see him later to discuss the results. On the given day I was a bag of nerves. So that day one of our coworkers thought shed be funny and tell me the rental car I was driving had a flat. It wasn’t of course. O was not amused

Comments are closed.